Walter Jacobson, M.D.

Walter Jacobson, M.D.

Posted January 1, 2011

Published in Lifestyle

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A New Year's Resolution: A Call For Love

Read More: acceptance, forgiveness, happiness, love, New Year's resolutions, self help

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Many of us, oftentimes, call out for love from our loved ones in ways that are inappropriate, hurtful and destructive, such as when we attack them with verbal assaults when we feel threatened, rejected or invalidated.

Underneath our attacks, including those that are passive-aggressive, is a deep fear of abandonment and a deep desire to be nurtured and loved. But rather than come out and say that, rather than communicate that we are feeling insecure and unloved, and that we desire to be reassured and nurtured, we get angry and we attack.

The end result is the exact opposite of what we want: we push our loved ones away rather than draw them to us.

Love or a Call For Love

Ultimately, everything that people do is either love or a call for love that is disguised in fear and attack.

If we are willing and able to accept this as true, that everything is either love or a call for love, then the appropriate response, regardless of what is happening, is to be loving.

So, on this first day of the New Year, let's choose to be loving in all our actions and let's make this our New Year's Resolution.

Let's make the decision today to behave in loving ways every day and in every way regardless of what's going on and who's doing what.

It doesn't mean we condone bad behaviors. It doesn't mean we accept abuse, allow ourselves to be doormats, or place ourselves in harm's way.

It means holding in our minds and hearts the ideals of compassion and acceptance. It means releasing judgments and resentments.

It means desiring to understand, to give the benefit of the doubt, to share, to care, to be considerate of the needs of others.

It means forgiving, letting go of the past. It means role modeling right thought and action for others.

This New Year's Day, if we embrace this one resolution, to respond to the call for love from others with unconditional love, and we practice this every day to the best of our intention, over time we will see benefits in our lives.

Love is all there is. Everything else is a bad dream. If we each do our part to be as loving as we possibly can, to put aside pride, ego, arrogance and self-entitlement, to be of service to others, to put our needs last instead of first, and to find ways to compromise for the greatest good of all concerned, our lives will work better and yield greater rewards, and our world will reflect these changes as well.

check out my book, Forgive To Win!: